Guide
Noob City, block by block
Almost everything in My Criminal Life happens somewhere on one painted map. Here’s what’s in each of the seven districts and how to find your way around.
Sign-ups are open.
How the map works
Open Explore from the game’s menu and Noob City fills the screen: 36 buildings painted into one picture, from the hospital on the hill to the casino strip and the docks. Point at a building, or tap it on a phone, and it lights up with its name and a line about what’s inside. Click to go in. A building with more than one door, like City Hall, opens a card of buttons instead.
On a phone the page starts on a plain list of places, which is quicker on a small screen. You can switch to the map whenever you like, and the game remembers which one you picked. Doors that aren’t open yet are still on the map, marked “soon”.
The seven districts
Every place below is a real door in the game. The ones marked “soon” are drawn and named but not open yet.
North Side
Hills, the park and old money.
- Hospital: Get patched up.
- St. Jude's Church: Weddings, candles and confession. (Weddings)
- Local School: Take courses and learn new skills.
- Lovers' Park: Find someone special. (Soul Mates)
- Cemetery: The legends of the city rest here. (Hall of Fame)
- Tina's Florist: A shop.
Financial District
Towers, trading floors and money.
- Stock Exchange: Trade shares in the city's companies. (Stock Market)
- Crown Credit Bank soon: Your credit card.
- Point Market soon: Buy and sell points.
West Side
Brick rowhouses, the gym and the diner.
- Dee's Diner soon: Coffee, pie and loans from Mama Dee.
- Gym: Train your stats.
- Job Center: Find work and get paid. (Your Job)
- Community Hall: Talk it over with the city. (Forum)
- Pet Shop soon: Animals and accessories.
Downtown
The monorail loop and the heart of the city.
- City Hall: Polls, the city staff and how to join them. (Polling Booth, Game Staff, Staff Applications)
- Estate Agent: Buy a place to live. Selling and renting to other players open soon. (Your Properties)
- Courthouse soon: The city court. Trials open soon.
- Newspaper Office: The daily paper and the classifieds. (Newspaper)
- Post Office: Your mail. (Mailbox)
- Sweet Tooth: A shop.
East Side
Docks, factories and the jails.
- Monorail Station: Trains out of Noob City.
- County Jail: Do your time or bust someone out.
- Federal Jail: The long-stay prison.
- City Dump: Dig through the trash for finds.
- Midnight Motors soon: New, used and "previously enjoyed." Cars, your garage and the street races.
- Dockside Market soon: Trade items with other players.
- Old Factory soon: Where gangs settle it.
Red Light District
Neon, nightclubs and no questions asked.
- Casino: Try your luck.
- Local Drug Dealer: A shop.
- The Back Room: Put a price on someone's head. (Post Bounty)
- Card Shop soon: Collect and swap.
South Side
Tenements, the rail yard and the gangs.
- Gang HQ: Run your gang, find one or start your own. (Your Gang, Turf soon, Gang Wars, View All Gangs, Search Gangs, Create a Gang)
- Basketball Court: Climb the attack ladder. (Attack Ladder)
- Police Precinct: The city's most wanted. (Most Wanted)
- Sargent Smiths: A shop.
- Rail Yard Market soon: Gang supplies.
Leaving Noob City
The Monorail Station on the East Side runs trains to the other cities. A ticket costs $1,000, and each city opens at a higher level, so the map of where you can go grows as you do. Every city has its own boss on the Most Wanted board.
For now Noob City is the only one with a painted map. The others show their places as a list.
More guides
How to play
Your first day in Noob City: the bars, crimes, the gym, jobs, jail and levelling up.
Read the guide →
Gangs and turf
Starting a gang, the shared vault, gang wars and respect, and the turf coming to the map.
Read the guide →
The casino
The Velvet Rope: the rooms, the games, the published odds, and why it is game cash only.
Read the guide →See it for yourself
It’s free, it runs in your browser, and you can pull your first crime a few minutes from now.
Sign-ups are open.